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The "Nice" Factor

Tayfromcarolina

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Mike D Whistle-Stop

Mike D

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Hi. I have been lurking on the Charlotte forum for a while now. I'm considering a move to Charlotte for when I finish graduate school. Charlotte is just one of many places I've been considering. I've read a lot of good things about Charlotte and I think it has one of the nicest skylines in the country. If I did move there, I would be a "Northern transplant" because I have lived in the Northeast my entire life. I was born and raised in New York City, lived in Philadelphia for my first two years of college followed by three years at the University of Connecticut (where Emeka Okafor played before joining the Bobcats). I currently live in Boston, where I'm in grad school.

I can't pass judgement about the friendliness of the people in Charlotte since I've never been there before, but I do know this - I've come across a lot of miserable, unfriendly people in New York, Philly and Boston. I've come across nice people too, but the bad seem to outnumber the good, especially on the roads. Almost no one smiles at each other, much less looks at one another (you'd get a nasty "HEY! Whatchoo lookin' at?" if you did, and you'd be lucky if that's all you got). They're just very wound up tight up here. I get the feeling that while there are rude and friendly people everywhere you go, I think the rotten apples are fewer and further between down south than they are up north.

I feel like I'm ready to try living in another part of the country. Because everything up north is so expensive. Because of the brutal winters (the last three winters were especially bad up here). I also feel that the local and state politicians only care about themselves, especially in Mass, NY and Penn. And there just doesn't seem to be a lot of good news about the economy up north, while it seems like the south is poised for really strong econmic growth and much more job opportunity. One other place I'm considering moving too is Providence, RI, a place with a lot of great urban redevelopment going on. But one of my biggest concerns is the job market there (tied heavily to Boston due to its proximity)

While Charlotte is not the only place I'm considering moving to, it seems to have a lot going for it right now. Lots of new construction on both home and office buildings and the addition of commuter and light rail. And a booming population (can't say that about Boston or Philly right now). I hope to at least visit Charlotte to see what's going on down there.

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monsoon Gigalopolis

monsoon

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When I was in college in the UNC system I was always amused by the out of state students (mainly from the NY and Penn) who claimed to have gotten a better education than we did here in the Carolinas, yet I and most of my friends from the Carolinas always had better grades.

Later when I graduated and went to work for a very large corporation that hired nationally I was again amused by co-workers who made something of their much more expensive degrees from NE schools. Yet they got paid the same as I did and over the years their careers had little to do with where they went to school.

The moral of the story is school is what you make out of it, not where you go.

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nyxmike Hamlet

nyxmike

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I don't want a pissing match either...

Well, Queens County was the most diverse county in the U.S when I lived there (it's second now), but I guess Miami caught up. And I am not saying anything negative about Charlotte. Cut it out with the exaggerating. I said I felt like I got a better education at CMS than private school, but a lot of their schools have outdated campuses (except for the new ones they are building which are really nice) that are pretty gross, they have a tight budget on supplies, and there are a lot of mobile classrooms. I don't remember having any of those problems back ho... I mean, in Nassau County. The reason why I mentioned Union County and Lake Norman is because it surrounds the city of Charlotte, just like Nassau (which is suburban county, like Union, and parts of Mecklenburg, such as Lake Norman) and NYC...

Forget it, it's like talking to a wall anyways, you mis-read or misinterpret what I say so I guess there is really no point.

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monsoon Gigalopolis

monsoon

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I'm not sure you could compare what you call Lake Norman to Long Island. The Lake area includes trailer parks, low income housing, public housing, but mostly middle class housing. Of course there are expensive homes here, but they certainly don't dominate as they do in Long Island. People of all incomes can and do afford to live here. It is mostly white, but there are black and hispanic neighborhoods as well.

I looked up the demographic information. (note these won't =100%)

Queens County

White 32%

Hispanic 25%

Black 20%

American Indian 0.5%

Asian 17%

Reporting some other race 11%

Reporting mixed race 6%

Queens County has been losing population since 2000

Miami Dade

White 20%

Hispanic 57%

Black 20.0%

American Indian 0.2%

Asian 1.4%

Reporting some other race 5%

Reporting mixed race 3.8%

Los Angeles

White 31%

Hispanic 44%

Black 10%

American Indian 0.8%

Asian 12%

Reporting some other race 25%

Reporting mixed race 5%

There are 10 million people in LA cnty, growth = 3% since 2000

Depending on how you look at the numbers one could argue that Queens or Dade are more diverse. However considering that LA county has 10 million people I would say it is America's most diverse county by a looong shot.

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nyxmike Hamlet

nyxmike

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Trust me there are plenty of trailer parks, low income housing, public housing, and middle class housing on Long Island. It may be dominated by wealthy people, but theres plenty of middle class and poor towns too...

The last I heard was that Queens was the most diverse, but after looking it up, it changed. Dade County is now the most diverse, followed by Queens. Never thought about it, but LA county seems to make sense. Either way all 3 are pretty much up there as the most diverse.

By the way I think Charlotte really is an exciting city because so much is going on right now - I know a lot of people who move there and love it, and others just need time to adjust, especially if they are relocated. If Charlotte was built on the coast, I would of adjusted much faster... I love the ocean, so that was something I had to get used to after moving there - that and the bread, lol. Does anyone know of any good bakeries there? I could never find one...

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Mike D Whistle-Stop

Mike D

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When I was in college in the UNC system I was always amused by the out of state students (mainly from the NY and Penn) who claimed to have gotten a better education than we did here in the Carolinas, yet I and most of my friends from the Carolinas always had better grades. 

Later when I graduated and went to work for a very large corporation that hired nationally I was again amused by co-workers who made something of their much more expensive degrees from NE schools.  Yet they got paid the same as I did and over the years their careers had little to do with where they went to school.

The moral of the story is school is what you make out of it, not where you go.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Ain't that the truth :lol:

Funny, you should mention that. A lot of Northeasterners have a bad habit of making fun of the South (even though they really have no right to do so). Once at UConn, I spoke with a girl who lived on my dorm floor was in a music academic fraternity called Kappa Tau Sigma (I think). Anywho, I pronounced Tau as "Taw" and she rudely said to me "It's pronounced "Tou"! Only Southern people say "Taw"!

I was so p!ssed at her for saying that, but then again she struck me as being a bit of dim bulb, so the hell with her anyway. It is true, though - the further you go in your career, the less your school has to do with it.

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Mike D Whistle-Stop

Mike D

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Trust me there are plenty of trailer parks, low income housing, public housing, and middle class housing on Long Island. It may be dominated by wealthy people, but theres plenty of middle class and poor towns too...

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Massachusetts has its share of trailer parks too - much to the dismay of the intellectual snobs up here who like to pretend that it doesn't. But eastern Mass and LI have quite a lot in common (Bay Staters will shudder if you say that, BTW)

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Mike D Whistle-Stop

Mike D

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The last I heard was that Queens was the most diverse, but after looking it up, it changed. Dade County is now the most diverse, followed by Queens. Never thought about it, but LA county seems to make sense. Either way all 3 are pretty much up there as the most diverse.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Queens is very diverse - which is something I love about it. Certainly more diverse than the Bronx, where I grew up. But I doubt that I could afford to live in Queens - which is one reason why I have the Queen City on my list of places to consider moving to.

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Mike D Whistle-Stop

Mike D

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Charlotte born and raised and I've always tried to smile and say hi, how are you doing to most everyone. It's just the way I was raised. I even nod or smile to the homeless people but now I tend to stray away from that cause they assume that you're giving them permission to haggle with you for their "bus fare."  I notice it most everywhere I go that people are like that around here. It's just the way it is.  Although, I have noticed that the "church factor" has seemed to wear off a little.  Used to be that one of the first questions asked to new people was "what church to you go to?"

On a side note, my freshman year of college, I went to NYC for spring break and was waiting in line at the taxi stand at Laguardia.  I asked a group of businessmen in front of me how much it would cost for me to get to Manhatten where I was staying and it soon became apparent that I wouldn't have enough for the fare.  They said, "tell you what, here's the $5 you'll need to cover it, just promise us you'll never tell anyone that New Yorkers are the stereotypical jerks."  Then,  a girl standing behind me "adopted me," asking where I was going and offered to share a cab, splitting the cost, and made sure I got to where I was going.  So, not all Yankees are bad.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

It's good that you do that - I still believe courtesy goes a long way and I hope that doesn't disapper from Charlotte and other parts of the South. I'm glad you found the businessmen who gave you $5 for cab fare - unfortunately folks like that are a rarity in NYC - especially Manhattan.

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reverbandwhiskey Hamlet

reverbandwhiskey

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Glad to here it - I never liked LA - hate that Freeway traffic.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Living in Los Angeles for three years actually caused me physical and emotional damage. I was always sickly, and unhappy. It began to creep into my personal and sex life. Within days of arivin g in Charlotte everything seemed to get better.

I love seeing birds, trees, grass, and squirrels from my home. I enjoy not hearing car alarms every 15 minutes, constant police sirens at night, or screaming neighbors. I hated the constant noise, light, and chemical pollution as well. Right now looking out my window I see a handful of birds, two butterflies, and friendly people. In fact, I think I'll go for a bike ride right now! :)

I LOVE this city.

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SmellyCat Burg

SmellyCat

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I used to live in Queens too, in fact when I was there it was touted as the most ethnically diverse zip code in the U.S. - 11370. Jackson Heights. On my block lived Asians, Indians, Columbians, Ecuadorans, old school German families and Eastern Europeans. On the morning subway ride to work, you could at anytime hear maybe 5 different conversations going on all in different languages.

But ironically, I found that outside of small pockets of Queens, especially in Long Island, Westchester and Northern New Jersey, and most of the other NYC boroughs, the neighborhoods were almost totally segregated. Sure, there was diversity on the whole, but all the whites lived together, the african americans, the latinos, etc. It was quite sad, really.

I see much more mixed neighborhoods down here and more attempts to create them, such as in First Ward.

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murderingmouth Unincorporated Area

murderingmouth

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Perhaps my experience is unique, but I've analyzed it to mean that Southerners are less concerned about appearances. I think there is something to be said about the fact that the south is now the driving economic engine of the country: whilst the NE is obsessed with an underdog has-been attitude and the west is obsessed with a glam Hollywood attitude, the South is going about its business and taking over the world!

My family are non-religious Californians who are actively hostile about my decision to shack up with a same-sex partner. They are paranoid about how their friends and family will perceive them if they know their son is queer. They refuse to spend time with us as a couple or have him over for holidays, and have never visited me since I left my home town (instead I visit them all the time and they complain when I don't).

Strangely, my partner's parents are fairly religious multi-generational Caroliners, and to them it's a total non-issue. The first thing we did when I first met them was hop in the car and drive all around northern NC to visit all the relatives, have thanksgiving with the family, shoot the crap with the NASCAR-obsessed cousins, etc. I felt more comfortable with and welcomed by these semi-rural southerners than my own semi-urban California family. It seemed they were most concerned that I demonstrate I'm a nice, non-loser person and that I make their son/cousin/nephew happy.

It's sort of the way I always saw my relationship: it's a non-issue. My parents and peers seem to treat the idea that I'm "GAY!" as a primary part of my life and make it a central topic of most conversation, even though I never initiate it. My in-laws didn't seem to think it was even an issue, as if my partner could have brought a hermaphrodite chimp to Thanksgiving and it wouldn't have phased them.

MM

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Mike D Whistle-Stop

Mike D

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Perhaps my experience is unique, but I've analyzed it to mean that Southerners are less concerned about appearances. I think there is something to be said about the fact that the south is now the driving economic engine of the country: whilst the NE is obsessed with an underdog has-been attitude and the west is obsessed with a glam Hollywood attitude, the South is going about its business and taking over the world!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I don't think the major Northeastern cities an underdog attitude - if anything it's quite the opposite. Lots of people in NYC, Boston and Philadelphia act as if no other place in the US matters and that the NE is the most "enlightened, progressive" part of the country and they feel it will always be that way and they will always be on top. OTOH, a smaller city like Providence takes stock in what they have and are actively working to improve the city and is undertaking a lot of projects and doesn't take the attitude that they're better than everyone else.

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