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What Cities Can One be Openly Gay In?

Choirboy622

By Choirboy622
in Urban Design & Architecture

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AvianKeahi Whistle-Stop

AvianKeahi

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There are three openly gay members of the Minneapolis City Council. The Council has 13 members. There are four gay candidates for the upcoming election and there are openly gay candidates running for offices on the school board, library board, park board, and tax board. Mayor R.T Rybak (who is straight) is fully supportive of gay issues and annually participates in the Pride Festival.

From an article in City Pages (an alternative weekly): "Gary Schiff, for instance, prefers to discuss his ideas on urban planning instead of his sexuality. 'It's not particularly interesting to me,' he states. 'Voters don't care what my sexuality is. They just want to make sure I'm not in bed with Target.'"

Recent actions taken by the council:

1} DOMESTIC PARTNER RESOLUTION Date: 10-13-00 Votes: For=13 Against=0 Vote for a resolution urging the Minnesota Legislature and Governor to authorize domestic partner benefits for all Minnesota public employees.

2} EQUAL BENEFITS ORDINANCE Date: 12-13-02 Votes: For=8 Against=4 Vote to require that businesses with contracts of more than $100,000 with the city of Minneapolis provide domestic partner benefits to their employees. This includes both same-sex and opposite-sex partners. This ordinance contains many exceptions, including development contracts, faith-based organizations and businesses with 21 or fewer employees.

3} INCREASE RECOGNITION OF DOMESTIC PARTNERSHIPS Date: 8-22-03 Votes: For=13 Against=0 Vote to recognize domestic partner registrations from other cities, a move based on a New York City ordinance; include domestic partners in the housing code

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Germaine Unincorporated Area

Germaine

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I agree with Dylan

I read in the NY Times that Asheville has become a gay mecca with people resettling there from SF, NYC, Boston, etc. b/c of the openness of the city.

My friends in Chapel Hill tell me that another town in the Raleigh-Durham Triangle has had a gay mayor for years.

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Dylan Whistle-Stop

Dylan

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I read in the NY Times that Asheville has become a gay mecca with people resettling there from SF, NYC, Boston, etc. b/c of the openness of the city.

My friends in Chapel Hill tell me that another town in the Raleigh-Durham Triangle has had a gay mayor for years.

It has been like that for many years now I think.

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LJinPA Unincorporated Area

LJinPA

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The Scranton / Wilkes-Barre area shares a "gay community" Last year we had our first "pride picnic" though it was not very publicized. Apathy seems to be the rule here. In the past ten years we have become quite tolerant but notice I say "tolerant" not accepting or "warm and inviting" there's a HUGE difference.

In a lot of ways, even though this area is extremely Democrat and politically left wing, it is very provincial. I think being origionally settled by New Englanders in the 1700's we inherited some of that attitude that "anyone has the right to exist and not be harassed, but that doesn't mean we want to be your friend". People can be very clannish here as in much of the coal region, old families, old close-knit ethnic groups, people here tend to live with parents until they're married... It's not so much that people are philosophically anti-gay, but anti eccentric...

Examples of eccentric: New Age People, anything too artsy fartsy, anything "bohemian", Married str8 couples who don't have 2.5 kids immediately after marriage. Many people use the word "GAY" to describe anyone unconventional unless their validated by being part of a well known fad (goth, ravers)

Its actually easier to be OUT of the closet than IN here, everyone knows everyone, if your going to come out in other words you have to come out "all the way". I came out 12 years ago when I was 16. I have had very little harassment since high school. Outspoken anti-gay demogogues are almost non-existant at least in the last decade.

It's about 3/4 Catholic here but most anti gay attitudes here have to with discomfort w the unfamiliar not ideology or religion, this isn't the bible belt.

Many gays find acceptance here for one BIG reason. People prefer to hang with those they grew up with well into adulthood. If people don't know you for years they may not do more than tolerate you no matter what you are. YET once your IN either cause you grew up with the people or your saavy enough to learn the secret handshakes and the intangable rules of conformity, people will accept you and stick up for you no matter what you are!!! and be loyal friends for life...

Allentown/Bethlehem, and Harrisburg despite being less "democrat" actually have more organized gay communities... But this area still not the worst... :)

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LJinPA Unincorporated Area

LJinPA

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Boston is truly a gay-friendly city. Not just gay-friendly, but bi-friendly too. Sexual orientation just isn't much of an issue there. It is very European in social climate.

How gay friendly is St. Paul? It seems much more conservative than Minneapolis.

Can you elaborate on what you mean by "BI friendly" ...Bi friendly as opposed to what? DO you know of gay friendly places that are not bi friendly? I'm just curious. I always figured bi's would normally be a lot better accepted than gay guys.

Also another thing to consider is what is the gay "scene" like in these cities discussed. Decent club scene? Any life outside the gay bars.

I think one problem in Northeast PA is there is very little to do outside the bars, not just in the gay scene either. For generations the neighborhood bar has been the cornerstone of the social scene up here. We do have a few large nightclubs popular with the college crowd but for the most part Irish Pubs, Sports Bars, and Ethnic Bars/Slovak clubs, Polish VFW's..... (or singing "Sweeeeet Caroline" at Karaoke) :whistling: It's the hert and soul of socialization here. A lot like "Cheers" :whistling: Where everybody knows your name... :whistling: Where people, gay or straight go for Pizza, Wings, a few Beers, or to contemplate the world's profound issues over some vodka (Local Politics, Unions, the Penn State Notre Dame Game, which 80's song you wrestled to in HS or remembering your HS sweetheart. Frequently you'll hear Journey, Survivor, Night Ranger, or Springsteen in the background. It's hard to find any after hours parties here since so many still live with their entire family tree or have kids of their own... While these environments are quaint, nostalgic and certainly not hostile thay aren't the most comftorble to be "different" in unless u know the people well...

PA cities are more diverse outside the coal region as far as things to do, it would be nice to find some gay or gay friendly social scene while giving your liver and wallet a rest though ;)

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Choirboy622 Whistle-Stop

Choirboy622

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Can you elaborate on what you mean by "BI friendly" ...Bi friendly as opposed to what? DO you know of gay friendly places that are not bi friendly? I'm just curious. I always figured bi's would normally be a lot better accepted than gay guys.

I think one problem in Northeast PA is there is very little to do outside the bars, not just in the gay scene either. For generations the neighborhood bar has been the cornerstone of the social scene up here. We do have a few large nightclubs popular with the college crowd but for the most part Irish Pubs, Sports Bars, and Ethnic Bars/Slovak clubs, Polish VFW's..... (deleted material) ... It's hard to find any after hours parties here since so many still live with their entire family tree or have kids of their own... While these environments are quaint, nostalgic and certainly not hostile thay aren't the most comftorble to be "different" in unless u know the people well...

Your description of the cities in Northeast PA sound like Kenosha and Racine, Wisconsin. Very blue-collar, very in-grown, and you need to know someone there in order to be accepted. :(

My thought is that some people are more gay-friendly than bi-friendly. Some people (wrongly) look at bi people as being in "denial" about their sexual orientation, and trying to be on the fence, so to speak. ;)

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LJinPA Unincorporated Area

LJinPA

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I don't know if any of you guys are old enough to remember "All in the Family" and "Archie Bunker". Someone please say yes so I don't feel OLD (I'm 28 but remember the re-runs). Archie Bunker would be the perfect example of a rather distinctly northeasten/rust belt style of narrow-mindedness common in my area (stodgy, cynical, but despite his discomfort doesn't truly HATE anyone). This as opposed to the fundamentalist christian/fronteir mentality that gets discussed a lot. I use this example since I'm not always good at putting life's intangible realities into words.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_In_The_Family

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Archie_Bunker

240px-10040550.jpg

Critics of this show according to the Wikipedia article felt that Archie Bunker was portrayed as too loveable and good natured(a loyal family man) and felt his character should have remained consistantly unlikeable, but it at least shows how things are not all "black and white".

I remember the one show about the gay guy who got gay bashed in Brooklyn and after that he softened up.

Also I mentioned above about tolerance for eccentrics and being different...Here's an example some of you may be able to relate to ;) :

At this point I actually have more people who find my interest in skyscraper forums and skylines and piles of albums of city skyline pics that I took myself or collected and map books, as well as my interest in The Weather Channel to be far more disturbing than being gay!!! It's almost hilarious in some ways. Even among some of my gay bretheren it's considered freaky. One explained that if I were an architect or urban planner it would be understandable but i work in social services... When I mentioned to one the names of a few acquaintences who have problems w drugs or even a few minor brushes w the law, he pointed out that while drugs are not cool, they're still "normal".

People who would have hated gays a generation ago may think it's "cool" now but here's my point:

Even (some) so-called "open-minded" blue-staters can have discomfort around anything different. Yet when the intellectual elites find a pattern and assign a group identity, or a politically correct victim status, THAT is when you switch from being "disturbing" to almost a hero. I also have ADD which wasn't cool when I was a kid, now the many who have it brag about it. Similar pattern... People shouldn't need a group identity or martyr pedestal to be accepted in spite of their differences...

BTW you guys may want to do a few searches on sites like gaybars.com or damron.com, they list most of the gay establishments for each city. They could give you some idea of what to expect. And once the gay travel books mention a place frequently, it's usually a sign that it is "safe"

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colin Burg

colin

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San Francisco and Seattle are probably the most gay-friendly that I've been to.

As far as a city goes though (as opposed to metro area), West Hollywood would be the easiest to be openly gay in. Another might be West University Place in Houston, where some of the more wealthy gay and lesbian couples co-exist with wealthy suburban-esque families. That's not to imply that Houston is at all safe for open homosexuality though (it would cause problems in most areas of town).

As for poor gayborhoods, I've never heard of one. Houston had some gay-dominated apartment complexes around the Montrose area that were pretty cheap, and I'm sure San Fran has some as well.

But yeah, unfortunately the United States is full of bigots. You just can't get away from self-righteousness and people who feel that it's their business to tell you how to live. Although when it comes to truly minding one's own business, I've always thought of Seattle as being the best at that. Pac Northwesterners just seem to be much more laid back.

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jsauce Crossroads

jsauce

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well its sad i havent come out yet and i live in utah, very anti-gay , u know because all the mormons, my self being one,

But ive noticed that many men work in the center of Salt Lake City without being harrassed, as far as i can tell but u barley ever see two guys holding hands down the street , i mean the mormons profess that they accept all walk of life , but when any kid in high school comes out about being , he gets harassed and ridiculed so i dont think Salt Lake City , or even utah for that matter are very friendly

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Dozer Whistle-Stop

Dozer

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For those of you who mentioned Boston, I am quite surprised that you overlooked Cambridge. Don't forget the city that heralded the first gay marriages in Massachusetts (and the first legal ones in the U.S. at the stroke of midnight on the first day they were issued), and proudly calls itself the "People's Republic of Cambridge". I spent much time clubbing and bar-hopping in Cambridge and have always felt welcome, safe, and comfortable. It's a great city.

Another notable city, though smaller than Cambridge, would be Northampton, MA. This city has a feel similar to P-town, though a little bigger and a little more diverse. "Lesbianville USA" as it is often nicknamed, is very gay-friendly, very beautiful, and has a very liberal core, due in part to being surrounded by three colleges and 1 university, two colleges being all-female (Smith and Mt. Holyoke). I used to spend much time there (I am origionally from Western Mass), and always had a great time.

The mayors of Northampton and Providence, RI are lesbian and gay respectively. I currently live in Providence and feel generally safe and welcome, though there are some areas of Providence I wouldn't want to flaunt my stuff in.. ;)

-Bobby

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Snowguy716 Burg

Snowguy716

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LJinPA..

Don't worry.. I'm a few years your junior and even I have seen many episodes of "All in the Family"..

I'd say that people in my neck of the woods are also a little like Archie. That is changing though as people move up here in droves from Minneapolis.

My city, however, has been pretty gay friendly. I have many friends that are gay and I work with several gay people who are out. You know you're a pretty open community when you can accept people for being gay but not dwell on it.

There are also a lot of people around here that do not agree with the gay lifestyle on grounds that it is not natural. I believe they're wrong.. but they treat all people with respect and never do, support, or say anything that would curve their rights as a human being. That's the important part.

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UrbanAtl Whistle-Stop

UrbanAtl

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Atlanta is a great gay city mostly b/c gay businesses are supported by the entire Atlanta community. Most cities that I have been to that have a gay district seem to cater exclusively to the gay community and don't do a great job of reaching out, or the straight community doesn't do a great job of reaching in, whichever the case.

Atlanta is very open. It has to be to combat the racist stereotype that is placed on us by the rest of the US. Atlantans may not be more open-minded in the end but they sure don't want to live up to anyone’s expectations when it comes to racism. We pride ourselves on being home to Martin Luther King, Corretta Scott King, Jimmy Carter and many other humanitarians. Our city, more than most knows what racism brings and will do what we can to eradicate it when possible.

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