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Christian Influence


t.j.2125

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Its not like there are a ton of temples and mosques
Imo, this is true, driving through Charlotte, I haven't seen "tons".

I never said what Charlotte did or did not offer, a person can find most anything in most cities in American if they dig but I wasn't coming from the perspective of "digging" to find. I was thinking about it from the mindstate of going around in your everyday life and how often someone might stumble upon people who look like you, are of the same faith as you, dress like you, etc. and therefore being comfortable because you are not the token in many of the environments you enter into. For those that are "different" (for lack of a better descriptor), imo, they probably would have a harder time of this here than in some other cities. I know Charlotte is not NY, I don't expect it to be (what is) but the question posed seemed to me to be about how a person who is outside of the "norm" (Christian baptist) would feel.

Well, a muslim here would be is "outnumbered" so they perhaps would feel so - as would a jew. Its just the reality of the circumstances. The numbers make it so that I don't often see someone easily identifiable as a muslim or a jew (by clothing/adornment) in my basic travels of going to work, shopping, etc. That doesn't mean they aren't here. But if you got to dig to see them ...well for some that might not be work they want to put in. I simply find that I have little cause to say As sala'amu alaikum these days. And I haven't seen a person in a yalmulke since I've moved here.

Working uptown, I see a lot of different races of people - variations which are often predictable based on position. Everyone is friendly, Charlotte has some of the most polite people I've ever met (and I'm not complaining) and I've traveled some. But its all a bit plastic.

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I apologize for the comparison, as you are right, the domestic partner benefits issue does have more undertones of discrimination.

My point was simply to say that it is a political issue. Many political issues are emotional for different people, and are intertwined with some very complicated moral and religious issues.

There are so many emotional political issues, like abortion, evolution, gay rights, welfare, equal access to public education, universal health insurance, etc. All trace back to some underlying moral, religious, or cultural value.

From my perspective, the current status of a political debate does not really reflect how people are treated on day to day basis.

You have a lot more experience with this community than I do, and no doubt there is unfortunately still intolerance to gays for religious reasons.

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Meaning that you see more "minorities" in certain types of jobs. The higher up in management you go the more it is almost entirely white & male. The tech departments are full of asians and indians, often foreigners (with tech managment mgmt being predominately white and male), operations (paricularly on the lower level) black & hispanic, HR (black & hispanic except for the bosses), brokers/traders are predominately white & male with a sizeable portion of white females, some black and/or latino males, and a sprinkling if any black and/or latina woman, secretaries are predominately women and with a nice portion being black and/or latina.

The variations of races/sex you will see in the position can often be predicted by the positions themselves. Hence you have the occasional incident (for example) of someone assuming a black female manager is the secretary.

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The tech departments are full of asians and indians, often foreigners (with tech managment mgmt being predominately white and male), operations (paricularly on the lower level) black & hispanic, HR (black & hispanic except for the bosses), brokers/traders are predominately white & male with a sizeable portion of white females, some black and/or latino males, and a sprinkling if any black and/or latina woman, secretaries are predominately women and with a nice portion being black and/or latina.

The variations of races/sex you will see in the position can often be predicted by the positions themselves. Hence you have the occasional incident (for example) of someone assuming a black female manager is the secretary.

Why don't you jump in a time machine and join us in the year 2005.

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Meaning that you see more "minorities" in certain types of jobs. The higher up in management you go the more it is almost entirely white & male. The tech departments are full of asians and indians, often foreigners (with tech managment mgmt being predominately white and male), operations (paricularly on the lower level) black & hispanic, HR (black & hispanic except for the bosses), brokers/traders are predominately white & male with a sizeable portion of white females, some black and/or latino males, and a sprinkling if any black and/or latina woman, secretaries are predominately women and with a nice portion being black and/or latina.

The variations of races/sex you will see in the position can often be predicted by the positions themselves. Hence you have the occasional incident (for example) of someone assuming a black female manager is the secretary.

That is the way it is all across Corporate USA, this is not just limited to Charlotte. I know many females who have become VERY POWERFUL.

One that I know is Amy Brinkly who is the Chief Risk Oficer of BofA right down the road.

Brinkley watches out for all the risks Bank of America faces—from losing its best employees to getting squeezed by fluctuating interest rates. The risk department also oversees $522 billion in loans

There is not a man I know that can hold a candle to this gal in terms of her knowledge and skill. She is also listed in Fortune's most powerful women in Corporate America.

A2

(for what it is worth my boss's boss's boss is female.)

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That is the way it is all across Corporate USA, this is not just limited to Charlotte
Oh definetely, its nothing new. People are trying to break down that glass ceiling everyday and many have made some serious cracks. When you go into Amy Brinkley's story you see how she made a lateral move that turned into a goldmine. She's a smart cookie and of course she's a blonde (i've seen more blonde women in Charlotte than I ever had in my entire life).

Why don't you jump in a time machine and join us in the year 2005.
not getting this - I wasn't saying that this is how I wanted it, I was saying how it often is.
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I'm an atheist and the wife is a non-practicing Unitarian. We do just fine. Sunday mornings are great for shopping!

To the tolerance issue, I agree about the tolerance of Christians. The issue I have with the Presbyterians is the tolerance is one way. My neighbors saw no harm is trying to convert our daughter, but I can't imagine the hoo-haw if I tried to convert their kids to atheism.

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Everyone is friendly, Charlotte has some of the most polite people I've ever met (and I'm not complaining) and I've traveled some. But its all a bit plastic.

What do you mean by "plastic?" I assume you're saying that the courtesy here is insincere. What's the alternative? What's real?

I wonder how many times I've held the door for someone and had them think my politeness was bogus. I wonder what they think motivated my gesture.

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I moved to Charlotte from NYC. There are definitely more churchgoers here than in NYC, but there are lots and lots of people who have no religious connection whatsoever. My co-workers consist of more churchgoers than in NYC, but there is a large minority who aren't religious, and I work with a few Jews and Muslims. People tend to keep their private lives and personal views to themselves, with a few exceptions, and my co-workers are generally much more polite and less abrasive than the ones NYC; I wouldn't think one's religious beliefs would matter much at all around here.

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I apologize for the comparison, as you are right, the domestic partner benefits issue does have more undertones of discrimination.

I apologize also for being so negative towards your response. You of course are completely entitled to whatever opinion that you have on the subject and I was wrong to call you out on it.

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What do you mean by "plastic?" I assume you're saying that the courtesy here is insincere. What's the alternative? What's real?
No, I'm saying Charlotte can feel at times a bit "plastic". Working uptown and watching the people, its amazing how similar everyone looks, dresses, acts, etc. The smiles/courtesty are sometimes rote and sometimes they seem to mask a whole lot of anger and hostility. Sometimes when you dig a little deeper real sentiment and feelings come out and the people are not nearly as good hearted as the general smiles and courteous demeanor would lead one to believe. As been expressed here, people hold their tongues and are "tolerant" - tolerant isn't the same as acceptance, understanding, cooperation, etc.
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Those are mostly corporate worker droids. Being fake is part of the job and most of them are not from Charlotte anyway.

I find however that generally are genuinlly more polite throughout much of the South once you get out of the Charlotte CBD. I wish more people would take the time these days to teach their children on the importance on being polite. It's always appreciated by me.

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What's more, I find the politeness and courteousness here to be HIGHLY contagious, especially for newcomers.

Having moved here from the northeast, I will tell you first hand that the hostility there is also contageous, but in a negative way of course. Examples: the road rage there is so bad it definitely has a way of rubbing off on you. If you don't believe me, try driving around Northern Jersey for a day and see how many times you see someone giving you the finger.

The honking is really bad too. Now I rarely if ever honk my horn - it seems like nobody here does!! Of course, I can't say I blame them for being grumpy up north. The commute is so darn miserable - being packed like sardines on a subway car is no fun, especially in the summer months when half the people stink to high heaven.

Since I work in an office where our ops are in both NYC and Charlotte, I often like hearing the impressions of the NY colleagues visiting down here. Most often comments heard are "People are so friendly down here" and "this place is a lot nicer than I thought".

So now that I've been here for over 2 years, I really think I'm a nicer person, or at least more courteous, and there's nothing plastic about it. At least that's what my friends who know me say.

As far as kids being rude - man, I think that's a national issue with this generation of spoiled kids. Good luck there.

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Those are mostly corporate worker droids. Being fake is part of the job and most of them are not from Charlotte anyway.
Very interesting and telling comment.

In many ways, I appreciate the politeness - particularly from the children. It can be refreshing at times coming from a place where thing move quickly and people don't always take the time to be "polite". But I don't confuse politeness with cordialness. One can be polite and yet not kind, welcoming, tolerant, etc. People here are very polite, I've never had more men hold the door for me in my life. But that act (for example) doesn't mean that I believe the men here have more respect for women. than in the NE.

As far as the honking of the horns goes, I don't do it here though it is often warranted. I refrain because the driving culture is different here and it comes off as antagonistic to beep your horn no matter how in the right you are about why you're beeping.

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Very interesting and telling comment.

In many ways, I appreciate the politeness - particularly from the children. It can be refreshing at times coming from a place where thing move quickly and people don't always take the time to be "polite". But I don't confuse politeness with cordialness. One can be polite and yet not kind, welcoming, tolerant, etc. People here are very polite, I've never had more men hold the door for me in my life. But that act (for example) doesn't mean that I believe the men here have more respect for women. than in the NE.

As far as the honking of the horns goes, I don't do it here though it is often warranted. I refrain because the driving culture is different here and it comes off as antagonistic to beep your horn no matter how in the right you are about why you're beeping.

Agreed completely. People in Charlotte are very pleasant and polite. But that doesn't mean that they're any nicer inside than people in the Northeast. I grew up in the South, lived in Boston and NYC for about 10 years, and then moved back to the Carolinas. People in Charlotte will smile as they stab you in the back. People in NYC will just curse at you as they stab you in the back.

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.... It can be refreshing at times coming from a place where thing move quickly and people don't always take the time to be "polite". But I don't confuse politeness with cordialness. One can be polite and yet not kind, welcoming, tolerant, etc. People here are very polite, I've never had more men hold the door for me in my life. But that act (for example) doesn't mean that I believe the men here have more respect for women. than in the NE. .....

I'm not sure if being polite means that you also have respect for the individual in question. Respect is something that is earned by the party in question, but lack of it doesn't mean that you have to be rude at the same time. If a stranger passes a kind gesture my way, I take it for what it is, a polite gesture. Likewise, if I do the same for someone else, I would hope they would not question my motives for being nice to them.

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I don't think polite gestures are meant to indicate how "nice" someone is. Nobody's saying, "I'll hold the door for you because I am less sexist than my Northern counterparts." It's just a way of making the lives of the people you encounter on a day-to-day basis slightly less miserable.

Interpreting manners as some kind of passive-aggressive slight is a pretty good way of killing off the practice of them, though.

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I think the reason people down south seem to be nicer is because they don't have to get from point a to point b so quickly. It's in everybody's human nature to be nice and positive, but the circumstances of the world force us to be short and curt with each other. What I mean is when you go at a slower pace, you learn to appreciate the more subtle things in life. To those who are intimidated by the "Christian influence" of Charlote, don't be. Don't give in to the machine that spews out negativity and would have you to believe that all feel that way. Most of us are tolerant and acccepting of our fellow man as long as they agree to love one another or don't add to the hype. What I'm ultimately trying to say is, slow down, get to know your neighbor, and you'll find out that he or she is not much different from you or me.

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A couple of thoughts.

1. Roman Catholicism is the fastest growing faith tradition in Mecklenburg County...RC's now outnumber Baptists.

2. Blondes and clothing ("clones" as lupachita calls them): nationwide, we all shop at the same stores, read the same magazines, and watch the same television and movies. Think Charlotte is plastic? It is simply a perfect representation of the United States as a whole. Homogenization of America. Don't like it? Sorry, globalization is upon us. I can buy the same H&M pants on every continent on the planet except Antarctica.

3. Diversity is what you make of it. I lived in an apartment across from Park Road Shopping Center (lesser Myers Park) over the past year. My neighbors were Indian, black, white, Hispanic, gay, and straight. The single family neighborhood that surrounds the complex is full of Greeks. Even Myers Park can't be pigeon holed as WASPY anymore.

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People in Charlotte will smile as they stab you in the back. People in NYC will just curse at you as they stab you in the back.
LOL. That's funny.

The question that started this thread was about whether a non Christian would feel outnumbered or stifled. Outnumbered? imo, probably because you are. Stifled? I'm not so sure. Is Charlotte an accepting city? Tolerant? Yes, Accepting? I'm not so sure.

Bottom line, if you're a yalmulke wearing jew looking to walk into your local convenience store and bump into another yalmulke wearing jew who's going to invite you to one of those speed dating things, then may have to alter those expectations a little. If you're muslim, jewish, Godbody or whatever and you want the option of turkey sausage instead of swine with your eggs - you're probably not going to find it at your local Showmars.

Interpreting manners as some kind of passive-aggressive slight is a pretty good way of killing off the practice of them, though.
Since I never said this then I guess I won't worry about it. I was not suggesting that one "question the motives" of "polite people. I am saying that people here can be very "polite" even as they are unaccepting and/or outright hostile. The ability to do so is an art perfected in the south and I've heard many a southener claim as much. So a newcomer may not want to make the mistake of confusing politeness with acceptance/cordiality as they are often not 1 and the same.
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LOL. That's funny.

The question that started this thread was about whether a non Christian would feel outnumbered or stifled. Outnumbered? imo, probably because you are. Stifled? I'm not so sure. Is Charlotte an accepting city? Tolerant? Yes, Accepting? I'm not so sure.

Bottom line, if you're a yalmulke wearing jew looking to walk into your local convenience store and bump into another yalmulke wearing jew who's going to invite you to one of those speed dating things, then may have to alter those expectations a little. If you're muslim, jewish, Godbody or whatever and you want the option of turkey sausage instead of swine with your eggs - you're probably not going to find it at your local Showmars.

Since I never said this then I guess I won't worry about it. I was not suggesting that one "question the motives" of "polite people. I am saying that people here can be very "polite" even as they are unaccepting and/or outright hostile. The ability to do so is an art perfected in the south and I've heard many a southener claim as much. So a newcomer may not want to make the mistake of confusing politeness with acceptance/cordiality as they are often not 1 and the same.

While I hate to be baited and realize that this has probably already been stated by someone more eloquent than I, one has to ask: Lupitachica, why the hell do you live in such a horrible place? Why did you pack up the house and move to such a backward, bigoted, and exceedingly white and Protestant city? If the diversity you crave can only be found in large Northeastern cities, then do us all a favor, move to one. If you decide to stay, then learn (and quickly) that the best way to make friends and earn respect in a new city (regardless of race, creed, sex, or sexual orientation) is to get involved in organizations seeking to make positive changes in the the things you see as the shortcomings of my home city. Then, and only then, will you have a right to complain.

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I am saying that people here can be very "polite" even as they are unaccepting and/or outright hostile. The ability to do so is an art perfected in the south and I've heard many a southener claim as much. So a newcomer may not want to make the mistake of confusing politeness with acceptance/cordiality as they are often not 1 and the same.

I have never heard that said myself. My guess is that you are getting these negative reactions from people because of your attitude, if it is the same in real life, as it is here. Southerners are not the conspiring asses as you are making them out to be and your comments are insulting. Unfortunately this is not the first time I have heard this from some transplants that think they know better and the place they came from was "so much better". In a way it is amusing as I always say that people might say one thing, but they really vote with their feet noting that you live in CLT now. In any case, as MC has said if you don't like it here please move back to the place that you came from.

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