Charlotte Pride

[suburban george3]

It does not seem to have hurt the Cracker Barrel. They were very anti-Gay at one time.

I try to be very mindful of places that espouse bigoted ideals and not spend my money there (Cracker Barrel included, even though that was painful.) Macintoshes will not be getting any of my money while and when I'm in the Charlotte area!

[Charlotte_native]

I think one of the most interesting(?) Takeovers was the first one at the Westin. The bar and entire lobby area were filled with gay partiers as the Black Baptist Convention was moving through the crowd working to check in -- they were in full Sunday Best gear -- I love hats with big feathers! Great part about it, other than looks from them trying to figure out what was going on, no confrontations and from my view and my friends, not even dirty looks.

[voyager12]

There was another article about the community center in today's O. It continues to be in dire financial straits. I know many people blame the center for a history of mismanagement and squabbling leading to this sad state. I do think it's important to keep it open. There needs to be gay visibility in this city beyond bars and keeping our community center open and thriving sends a very positive message to the rest of Charlotte. Letting it close would do the opposite. When I first moved to Charlotte and was getting my bearings it helped that there was a place to go to pick up information and learn more about the resources available in town and I was not alone. In my relatively short time here it seems that several marquee events and the center are always struggling and its hard to understand why. Charlotte Pride was a success last year but that is an exception to the rule and the center was the organizing force so if we lose it there is a likely chance that Pride shuts down too. We are the largest city in the Carolinas and have an affluent and active gay community. Charlotte is making strides regarding gay acceptance so I don't think homophobia is to blame. Wilmington and Myrtle Beach have successful gay community centers and Charlotte can't make it work? What's the problem? If the current organization is so debt ridden and ineffectual then one scenario would be to let it close and then reopen in a new location with a clean slate but that is a very thin reed to rely on and with real estate getting so expensive in Plaza Midwood where could they rent another space? I think the best option we have is to try to and bail out the sinking ship by donating money or time.

Edited January 26, 2007 by voyager12

[monsoon]

There is a huge amount of wealth in this city controlled by Gays and Lesbians however you won't see much of it going towards these kind of causes. I was involved in an effort to open a community center years before this one was opened. What we found, after a huge amount of work, was that the Charlotte "A-class" to use that term is not comfortable enough with being Gay where they feel that Gay advocacy is something they should support. There is this dichotomy amongst many Charlotte native Gays of accepting the social/sexual aspects of being Gay but not accepting what that means. It's something that I have seen somewhat in other cities, but it is very pronounced in Charlotte. This is why you see huge outpourings for organizations such as MAP, and nothing for the Community Center. At least this was the way it was years ago.

[voyager12]

There is a huge amount of wealth in this city controlled by Gays and Lesbians however you won't see much of it going towards these kind of causes. I was involved in an effort to open a community center years before this one was opened. What we found, after a huge amount of work, was that the Charlotte "A-class" to use that term is not comfortable enough with being Gay where they feel that Gay advocacy is something they should support. There is this dichotomy amongst many Charlotte native Gays of accepting the social/sexual aspects of being Gay but not accepting what that means. It's something that I have seen somewhat in other cities, but it is very pronounced in Charlotte. This is why you see huge outpourings for organizations such as MAP, and nothing for the Community Center. At least this was the way it was years ago.

That is very interesting. I have come across the same mindset. There are some successful gays in this town that will gladly support MAP or RAIN because these organizations while gay identified encompass causes that also impact the straight community. Thus providing cover from having to be openly gay supportive. Support for the Community Center does not provide this "out" since their founding mission is to increase visibility. Which would make some hesitant from providing assistance because they don't want to be seen as pushing the "gay" agenda which could also impact their professional success. How sad. I don't think that everyone who is gay has to be an activist but when a portion of the class of people needed to keep organizations such as the center going are too conflicted about their sexuality to provide help it's a very sad state of affairs to be in.

[Charlotte_native]

There have also been times in the past where various small gay and lesbian organizations don't work together and have internal squabbles. I worked with HRC for a while and tried to get a volunteer group to help with the dinner from the Gay and Lesbian Center and from Time Out Youth. We also tried to set up a 'scholarship' ticket program for those in those groups that could not afford tickets but wanted to go to the big annual dinner event. I was told by folks on both sides, HRC, Gay and Lesbian Center, and Time Out the reasons that they would not work together -- past "transgressions" by each group to the other, all kinds of, to me, absurd stuff. It appeared to be turf or power struggles. I moved on -- I don't have time for that kind of crap. To be honest I just haven't seen these groups do much that appears very professional or organized and they don't really seem to get the word out very well regarding any events they have or needs they have. If you don't read Q-notes you would never know about anything they do. I found out about Pride last year a week before it happened and didn't find out about Black Pride until a week AFTER it happened. This might not be so bad except my company has given thousands in the past to support both of these and they didn't even bother to tell us what was going on or to solicit support.

Edited January 26, 2007 by Charlotte_native

[Miesian Corners]

Just curious, do you think disinterest has anything to do with the fact that 'gay' is now somewhat in the mainstream of our culture and such places/events don't have the same importance they once did?

As a side note, I have a friend at UNC Charlotte who is working on the Human Rights Campaign dinner this year. She tells me that the Charlotte dinner is the second largest (after New York) in the country.

[voyager12]

I agree that homosexuality has made great progress towards acceptance here in the South and in Charlotte . There is still a long way to go though and I don't think the failure of gay organizations in this town comes as a result of "gay" not being an issue here anymore. Some of these charities are disorganized and that alienates donors. I wrote a check last year to one and it never cleared my account. They never cashed it. It was for a fundraiser I have donated money to other causes and have never received acknowledgements for the support. In contrast I went with some friends to the gay community center in Wilmington last time I was down there. The location is not large but well run and inviting. We did not donate anything but within the next week all of us gotten thank you notes in the mail for stopping by.

Edited January 26, 2007 by voyager12

[monsoon]

.... I was told by folks on both sides, HRC, Gay and Lesbian Center, and Time Out the reasons that they would not work together -- past "transgressions" by each group to the other, all kinds of, to me, absurd stuff. I.....

Ahh yeah. I am very familiar with that division and a lot of it has to do with what I said above. At one time the G&L SB was a hidden organization. It almost operated as a secret society. Volunteers where required to promise never to reveal the location and the identity of other volunteers and board members. At some point they decided to incorporate as a non-profit organization so that people could make tax deductible contributions. The paranoia about being discovered as a Gay group was so great that the group incorporated as the Metropolitan Community Service Project. That name was chosen so anybody associated with the financials of the organization could do so without anybody knowing what it was. This worked perfectly for this "dichotomy" I tried to describe. MCSP's board attracted some of the most well known of Charlotte's A-list at the time. In fact it was considered a status symbol by many. (and a bad reason to be on a BOD too)

Now interestingly enough there were others in this city that felt that Gays and Lesbians needed to make themselves better known given that at the time Sue Myrick, our mayor, had allied herself with the Reverand Joseph Chambers who was very outspoken against Gays. Others in this cadre included the former head preacher of the Northside Baptist Church (the domed building on 85N) who invited Anita Bryant to the city in a big conference against Gays and Lesbians. There were billboards all over Charlotte about this event. So many in the community, mostly outsiders to the A-list croud, felt that it was time to take very public stand against this type of thing. This is when groups like First Tuesday and Time out Youth were formed which were very open to the public eye.

This of course set up a big conflict with the MCSP group who felt they should be in control of everything and these new groups who felt that MCSP was a relic of the past that needed to go. Very bad blood was spilt in the resulting war as it got quite dirty and quite personal and involved a number of people that are still involved in some of these groups today. I was one of the very few people at the time that was involved in both groups and it was because of this turmoil that I withdrew from active volunteer work for a long while.

Eventually MCSP was disbanded and the SB became a public organization. I was invited to join its Board in 1999 and this is where I remember the planning and organization for the present community center started. From there my knowledge of the actual founding of the CC is limited as I had to leave the board, but I can see where the people at TO would be unlikely to involve themselves with the CC given this history.

[Charlotte_native]

Metro -- thanks for the insight. That makes complete sense based on my limited experience watching interaction with these groups.

[voyager12]

I received an email this week announcing a moderated Town Hall meeting at the Community Center on Feb 13th starting at 7pm. The Center board will be there as well as leaders of other organizations. Anyone who is interested in helping the Community Center survive is invited to attend and share their ideas.

[voyager12]

Today, St John and Park Road Baptists churches announced they are leaving the SBC before they get kicked out for refusing to discriminate against gays. Good for them. I only wish they were not the exception to the rule seeing as how the rest of the numerous Baptist churches in Charlotte apparently have no problem condoning bigotry in their houses of worship. Myers Park Baptist also refuses to back down from its gay accepting stance but they have decided to invite an SBC delegation to "visit" them before they get thrown out of the club. I wish I could be a fly on the wall for this tour. What are they going to do....herd the congregation together and play "Guess the Gay"? If they did this perhaps they would see how similar we really are and that our love is equal. Fat chance.

[voyager12]

The "Town Hall" meeting to save the Community Center was packed solid last night. I found this to be an encouraging sign since this town seems to be notoriously weatherphobic and even just steady rains keeps people indoors. There was some heated but respectful exchanges between community members and the board regarding how the center got into it's current dire predicament but emphasis was placed on having a brighter future. The current board is working on a strategic plan to help guide the CC to safer ground. Right now the priorities are simply keeping the ship afloat while the whole administrative and financial mess is sorted out. And its a MESS The consensus of the night was that Charlotte's Gay Community Center needs to be a "one stop shop" for the city's gay population mirroring the succcess of other cities. Increased donations are also a critical need. After this was made clear a guy who looked like Daddy Warbucks ( I mean right out of Central Casting down to the custom suit) stood up and pledged an immediate donation of 10k and also made clear that he would donate substantially more if he thought the center was moving in a positive direction towards sustainability and outreach. Right now the Center is surviving on Volunteers and they need all the help they can get. I signed up and would urge anyone else to do the same if they have the time. In the short term our Community Center is trying to build on the momentum of recent financial windfalls and working diligently to become relevant in Charlotte's gay life again. There is a total disconnect right now and everyone needs to pitch in to put the "community" back into our community center.

[voyager12]

The Human Rights Campaign's Carolinas Dinner is on the 24th. The Fellowship for The International Revival and Evangelism Church based in Concord is celebrating by holding a week long series condemning the evils of homosexuality. Something tells me good Mayor Pat McCrory would have no problem issuing a welcome letter for them. I don't recognize this name but judging from their home base I am sure they are connected to Flip Benham's Operation Save America. Their locale for the free lectures running Monday through Friday at 7pm is The Booth Playhouse at the Blumenthal. As much as I detest this whole idea they have every right to their opinion and to hold this event. What I am dissapointed in is the Blumenthal's apparent willingess to throw open their doors to this hatefest. They have every right to say no to individual requests. Gays and lesbians are big supporters of the Arts in this town and I sure as heck will not be going to any more shows there and encouraging others to boycott. I am also not sure whether I will attend these "lectures" or stand outside in protest. I really feel compelled to make a statement though and I hope some others in the generally apathetic gay community in Charlotte speak out as well.

Edited February 16, 2007 by voyager12

[monsoon]

^It's really a shame these kind of events are still taking place right in the center of downtown Charlotte.

[voyager12]

That is a lot of what rankles me. A week long series at The Blumenthal? In the heart of Uptown? What kind of message does this send? I wonder what kind of advertisment they will have on the large rolling Blumenthal sign along Tryon..."Come one come all to this limited engagement of weeklong gay bashing" The whole thing makes me I just received an email back stating that the Blumenthal is city owned property and it would be discrimination to deny this group the opportunity to be there. While this may be true it does not negate the fact that for a week one of the premier centers for the arts in Charlotte is going to be HQ for homophobia which is truly sad and regressive for Charlotte. It's also important to note how easily this "church" reserved said space on "city owned " property. Marshall Park is also city and or public property and it's worse than pulling teeth to get local gvt permits for Pride to be hosted there

Edited February 16, 2007 by voyager12

[Charlotte_native]

They are really going to enjoy the HRC Friday night event across the way in the Corporate Center from the Booth Playhouse. I have a feeling the Coalition for Conciousness will be far more bothered than those having cocktails and celebrating another record-breaking year for the HRC Dinner.

[Justadude]

I really feel compelled to make a statement though and I hope some others in the generally apathetic gay community in Charlotte speak out as well.

In situations like this, the best response is none at all. The more people attend the HRC dinner, the more press it will get and the less the anti-gay event will be noticed.

As a metaphor, I think about the preacher-man who berates people at the Square every so often. If you get up on a soapbox and start arguing with him, you've created a debate and forced bystanders into the position of taking a side (possibly his). But as it is, most people just walk by with a smirks on their faces and allow him to act the fool. Thus, he's basically become the village idiot instead of the Billy Graham that he obviously wants to be.

[voyager12]

I understand that point of view but disagree. I don't think ignoring homophobia is the way to combat it. Parties and fundraisers for the fight for gay rights is crucial but the response to this type of hatred should not just be going to a party with the choir. There is no grass roots gay activism in this town and that should change. You don't change minds by ignoring bigotry and hoping it just goes away. We had street preachers in Charleston all the time and I engaged them in debate whenever I had the chance. We can't have a gay event in Charlotte without these people waving insulting signs and screaming hellfire and damnation. Why shouldn't their event get protested in return?

Edited February 17, 2007 by voyager12

[suburban george3]

Why shouldn't their event get protested in return?

I concur, unfortunately it seems to many in the gay community here would rather remain closeted or just stay on the party circuit and not really deal with "real-world" issues facing them.

[uptownliving]

My opinion is that there are lots of things worth protesting for gay rights...but I don't think this is one of them. I think we have bigger fish to fry than to lend credence to some small time church in Concord exercising their free right to assembly and free speech.

My #1 goal with regards to gay rights in Charlotte is for the city to add sexual orientation to their non discrimination clause. I don't think protesting this church will do much good for that goal.

[voyager12]

I don't think making my voice heard in some way in protest of this hate group masquerading under the guise of Christianity takes away from other gay rights goals in this town. We have an uphill climb on every level in Charlotte and there needs to be more publicity about it.

[Charlotte_native]

If this preacher and his "events" at Booth Playhouse were largely ignored, he would go home FAR more unhappy than if a large divisive (and media worthy) debate occured. This is an attempt for attention, nothing more -- I, for one, am quite happy to work for gay rights and protest when necessary, but often strategy might work better than knee-jerk reactiveness. Think of how things will be played out at the event and in the media. The protests for Pride this year were, for the most part, left far out of the local media because nothing happened. No confrontations, no protesters allowed in the venue.

To win a PR situation like this figure out what the "other side" wants: publicity and a fight. Don't let them have what they want.

They also hope that the HRC dinner won't succeed: it has already sold out and is larger than all other HRC dinners around the country second only to DC. By the end of it there will have been over $200,000 raised to combat morons like this guy from Concord. HRC wins.

If you want to go back at this preacher, picket outside his Concord church one Sunday (on public sidewalks), do something that YOU come up with -- don't take the bait he is dangling in your face.

Just my way of dealing with things.

[monsoon]

There is an opinion on the editorial page of the Observer today from Michael Brown, director of the Coalition for Conscience" where he complains about the generally frostly response that he got from Charlotteans from his lectures at the Blumenthal. It's well worth a read because he compares the negative response to nothing more than mind control put forth by the liberal and homosexual agenda in this country. LOL It's good to see that Charlotteans don't automatically accept stuff like this anymore.

[voyager12]

That was a very interesting read Metro. Thanks for mentioning it as I almost missed it. The Dinner was evidently a great success and that alone probably bugs Michael Brown more than anything else. I found it noteworthy that he pointed to his Jewish ancestry and claims to be offended when anti gay people are compared to Nazis. He really needs to do his research since Nazis also targeted gays during the Holocaust and put them in concentration camps along with gypsies, communists and really anyone who disagreed with them in addition to Jews. I wonder if he has taken over Flip Benham's spot as local Homophobe in Chief. I detected a new spin from him that has moved away from Flip Benham's direct hate speech. Brown couches everything in " we are not bigoted and believe in tolerance but gays should not have any rights". I think I prefer Flip's shoot from hip style as opposed to the new "friendly homophobia".